They'll Never Go Tubing Again

"McMike" (mcmike) 07/15/2016 at 09:08 • Filed to: None

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MUSKEGON COUNTY, MI – They left for what they thought would be an easy float down Muskegon River Tuesday afternoon – but ended up spending the night on the river bank, scared and yelling for help.

The trio of young women were rescued 20 hours later after a fisherman eventually heard their cries, said Muskegon Township Deputy Fire Chief Bob Grabinski.

The women, all in their 20s, had never been tubing before and decided it would be a fun thing to do, Grabinski said. So they bought some tubes and headed to the popular launch site at the Maple Island Road bridge, Grabinski said.

“They were informed by somebody at the bridge that the river goes in a circle and if they put in there they would come back to their car,” he said. “Not knowing anything, they set off on their little adventure.”

About six hours later, with darkness closing in and their car nowhere to be found, the trio decided to get out on the riverbank where they ended up spending the night, Grabinski said.

“They said they hugged a tree all night yelling for help,” he said, adding that that stretch of river is very isolated.

About noon on Wednesday a fisherman floating the river heard their cries for help, investigated and then called 911. The women, one from Muskegon Heights and two from Muskegon, did not have a phone with them, Grabinski said.

Muskegon Township firefighters launched their 16-foot jet propulsion river rescue boat from the Holton Duck Lake Road launch ramp and found the women about a quarter-mile downriver, he said. Dalton Township firefighters also responded with their boat in case it was needed.

Other than a few bug bites and scratches, the women were fine, Grabinski said. He estimated they had traveled roughly 3 miles.

“In their words, they’re never going tubing again,” he said. “My words are know the river or take someone with you who knows it and have a plan.”

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RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > McMike 07/15/2016 at 09:17

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Not knowing anything

-Fire Chief Understatement

Also, I think there needs to be such a thing as a Troll Laureate, because

the river goes in a circle

shop-teacher > McMike 07/15/2016 at 09:17

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Whoever told them the river goes in a circle should be knee-capped.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > shop-teacher 07/15/2016 at 09:22

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Or given a medal, because wow. Maybe split the difference and make a medal from his shot-off patella.

shop-teacher > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht 07/15/2016 at 09:22

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That works!

yamahog > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht 07/15/2016 at 09:24

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“yea, for real, they call it The Great Moat River”

yamahog > McMike 07/15/2016 at 09:25

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Thaaaaaat sucks. Especially getting into one’s 20s having never gone tubing before.

Milky > McMike 07/15/2016 at 09:27

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Being from that area how in the world would you not know the river goes to Lake Michigan .... I’m actually flabbergasted and I rarely use that word.

Funktheduck > shop-teacher 07/15/2016 at 09:31

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There’s a funny story about a baseball player getting on 285 and circling it a few times because he didn’t know it was a loop. Not a river but come on.

shop-teacher > Funktheduck 07/15/2016 at 09:34

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Haha! I’ve known a few people who were clueless enough to do something like that.

SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie > shop-teacher 07/15/2016 at 09:40

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Wrong. The people who believed it should vacate the gene pool.

yamahog > Milky 07/15/2016 at 09:43

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*flabberflabberflabber*

shop-teacher > SidewaysOnDirt still misses Bowie 07/15/2016 at 09:47

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I’d say they learned the hard way. That’s enough.

DipodomysDeserti > McMike 07/15/2016 at 09:48

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Did they look like these guys?

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > McMike 07/15/2016 at 09:56

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Someone asked me about this the other day about floating our local river. I was speechless. The conversation was so harmful to my engineer brain I blocked it like those other traumatic childhood events.

McMike > yamahog 07/15/2016 at 10:02

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Never mind being deprived of the tubing experience, what about being in your 20s and not knowing how fucking rivers work.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever 07/15/2016 at 10:15

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Can confirm - engineering is a continuation of childhood.

yamahog > McMike 07/15/2016 at 10:18

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The Crazy Kanuck; RIP Oppositelock > Funktheduck 07/15/2016 at 10:23

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Same thing happen to me around Winnipeg.

Azrek > McMike 07/15/2016 at 10:27

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I just like how poor some folks survival skills are now today. Winters in Maryland (and the rest of the South) are fantastic when it is about to snow. But I will share a dumb story about those with 0 skills.

Back in High School, me and my friends liked to go camping. One weekend my friends were going to goto our favorite spot, but I couldn’t go as I had to work.

Friday night, I got home from work around 9pm and my dad handed me a note (This was the 90s). It read, “Please help. We can’t start a fire and it is cold.” My dad had a fantastic grin.

I sighed, got in my truck, drove 30 minutes and walked about a mile and a half to the campsite where I emerged with a lighter, a knife and a frown. My friends were all huddled around with flashlights and shivering.

In the middle of the ring of rocks I made months ago were 2 logs and a sad pile of sticks smoldering. I groaned and proceeded to teach the same Eagle Scout class on how to make a damn fire to my friends.

5 minutes later, I had a fire going and I wandered back to my truck. My dad found this hilarious, but I was less than thrilled. Now I think it is funny as hell.

PotbellyJoe and 42 others > McMike 07/15/2016 at 10:30

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3 miles. 3 miles and their response is to hunker down for the night.

There was a woman who died on the Appalachian Trail 2 miles off-trail because she went to use the bathroom, got lost and then just stayed where she was. Died of dehydration.

Darwin was on to something and NOFX furthered the thought with, “The industrial revolution. Has flipped the bitch on evolution.”

Azrek > McMike 07/15/2016 at 10:31

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You win the internet today, good sir.

RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht > PotbellyJoe and 42 others 07/15/2016 at 10:33

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I say it’s all just wind in sails. Are we not men?

PotbellyJoe and 42 others > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht 07/15/2016 at 10:39

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We are Devo.

Azrek > RamblinRover Luxury-Yacht 07/15/2016 at 10:40

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2nd Engineer also confirms...I have desk toys to prove this!

Highlander-Datsuns are Forever > Azrek 07/15/2016 at 10:50

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How many of those toys are star wars related?

Azrek > Highlander-Datsuns are Forever 07/15/2016 at 10:59

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Currently 0. Those kept getting stolen. I have Solitare Chess, Traffic Jam, Kanoodle Genius and Shape by Shape.